Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the Captain announced:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain.  Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from  London Heathrow to Toronto . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So sit back, relax  and..... OH, MY GOD !"

   

Silence Followed!..................

Some moments later the captain came back on the intercom. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you . While I  was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" 

One Aussie passenger yelled...

"For F- - - 's sake ........ You should see the back of mine!!!"